Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
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