I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize