Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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