thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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