so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
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I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Houston, we have a blender
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
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My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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