Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
bring money and cleavage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize