Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
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