he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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