I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
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