Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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