shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
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