They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
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