he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
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