well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
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