I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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