There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
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