the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
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