Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Do you remember whose house we're in?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize