We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Randomize