I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
Can Purell be used as lube?
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
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