Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
there is puke in my bra ... again
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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