if i died would you start the facebook group?
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize