ugly people sure do ruin things
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize