I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
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