I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize