what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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