WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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