well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
My legs feel like baby dolphins
He? As in you personified your dick?
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize