She is in my trunk
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize