my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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