well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take back everything I said about communal showers
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize