My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
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