You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Quick, to the slutcave!
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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