4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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