Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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