Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize