you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
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