just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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