So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
please come you make the beer taste better
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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