Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
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So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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