If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize