Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
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Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
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you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
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