hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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