Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize