in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
Just cropdusted the office
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
you will always have a special place in my vag
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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