Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
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She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
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