I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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