I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Please, let me fuck your mom
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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