So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Blood and glitter go together right?
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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