Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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